Here's a post I wrote two years ago - March 2012 - but never published. Ironically, I still feel pretty much this same way. I have a hard time writing about my kids these days because the moments feel so precious, and so fleeting. But I want to be writing about them. Isn't that the whole point - the writing them down allows me to hold on to them? So here's this post, two years later.Emry in March 2012, 17 months old
I haven't written specifically about Emry in a little while. There's a reason for this. My baby is growing up fast, and I'm awfully emotional about it.
He was such a baby for such a long time.
He got his first tooth at 14 months.
He was a dedicated crawler, not interested in walking until recently.
He was a mellow and happy baby.
I loved it.
What can I say? I love the baby phase. I adore the snuggling, the holding, the way I could meet all his needs. Now if I had a colicky baby, I'm sure I wouldn't love this phase. But Emry has been a dream baby. The kind of happy, ... more
View on this morning's run, Birch Bay, Washington, August 2012My father is a runner. My mother is a runner. My sister is a runner. My grandfather was a long-distance runner. Running is in my blood.But, up until about six weeks ago, I thought I hated running. My dad used to run track, and he wanted me to run in high school. "Do something with a finish line, something that's not so subjective," my dad said to his dancer daughter. Envious of my Mother/Father/Sister's obvious post-run ... more
A year ago, I was pregnant.I went to the pool a lot. Sometimes with my pregnant friends.Elan was already telling the baby jokes.Did I mention? I was VERY pregnant.But soon not to be.At 2 a.m., I woke up. It was pouring. First I heard the rain, then I felt the sensation of the contraction. It was the baby's due date ... more
My friend Kristina wrote an awesome post about her postpartum body experience. It looks by the comments that this is a topic that really resonates with the mamas.And I was cheered to see Penelope Cruz rockin' just the slightest bit of postpartum tummy. She looks awesome AND like she just had a baby. Well, at least by Hollywood standards she looks like she just had a baby.Photo credit: People Magazine online. (I read it; I admit it.)
New Year's Resolution: Lose 20 pounds. Months 3-4.I've been thinking a lot about patience. Before I became a mother, I knew that patience would likely be one of my biggest challenges once I had kids (that, and getting up early in the morning). And lo and behold, I was right! (A plus to having children in your 30s instead of in your bounce-back, energetic, can-get-no-sleep-and-still-function-just-fine-thank you very much 20s: you know yourself better).There's having patience with my kids, which some days is hard, and then there's having patience with myself, ... more
New Year's Resolution: losing 20 pounds, Month 2.January was about getting going; February is about building momentum. At the end of January, I was feeling pretty good about my plan. I had lost 2 pounds, not much, but a start. I was thinking that if I just kept up a slow and steady pace, I might make my goal. So I made February about building momentum, keeping the same basic plan as January with the addition of eating more whole grains and fewer simple carbs.Then February started, and my ... more
It's late January, and I haven't written about New Year's Resolutions. How is this possible? Where is the time going? Oh, yeah, the hours are eaten up by staring at my beautiful baby. He's so cute! How does anyone get anything done with such a cute baby?See what I mean?Anyway, I have big hopes for 2011. Jobs, health, good sleep... but the one I want to write about here & now is getting my body back.That is such a phrase -- "getting my body back." It makes me cringe. ... more
I was writing a post about New Year's resolutions, but I didn't finish it, and when I came back to it, I was in a different mood, a different place, a different person. That's the danger of not finishing something -- I either wait until the mood comes back around again, have to force myself back into it, or let it go.I will finish the post about New Year's resolutions, I will!But suddenly at 4:00 yesterday afternoon, the weariness set in. I don't know how else to describe that ... more
There's a lot going on these days -- in my world, in my body, in my mind. I'm a little bit overwhelmed. Job & work stuff makes me stressed. Packing up the teeny tiny clothes that Emry, in his 2-month-old plumpness, has already outgrown makes me nostalgic. Elan has been doing an A+ job of pushing my buttons, and then I get mad, and then I get sad that I feel mad and overwhelmed and nostalgic and stressed. All at the same time.Maybe there are some post-partum hormones going ... more
Raise your hand if you've ever gone bathing suit shopping when you're 7 weeks postpartum.I didn't think so.I'm not so much brave as desperate. As I mentioned recently, swimming is an awesome mind-cleanser for me, and Elan is putting us through the wringer, so I need a good mind-cleanser right about now. And the bathing suit I wore all through my pregnancy was starting to put me at risk for indecent exposure so...I started with one-pieces. I thought they would be more flattering. But this was an athletics store, ... more
Today, I got back into the pool. There were a few big hurdles to surmount: 1) the baby had to get his first bottle, an event which makes me tear up with the thought he doesn't need me anymore, but that I know is necessary if I'm going to have some freedom in the many months of nursing to come and 2) I had to deal with the bathing suit situation.I should back up for a minute. The last few months of my pregnancy, after I hurt my back and ... more